Anymore
by turbomagnus
Summary: A hero can endure, but a man has his limits; limits that Diego has reached when it comes to the way he is treated by those around him - including Victoria. Not a happy ending story.


In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: Zorro (this version, at least) belongs to New World Entertainment and the Family Channel and is used without permission or intent to profit.

Clothes with a Z slashed in them are to be repaired at your own expense.

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"Anymore"  
By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'

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Victoria had lost count of the days since Diego had come to the tavern. He had come into the pueblo, been to the Guardian office, spoken with the Alcalde, Sergeant Mendoza, other Dons and peons, but he hadn't come to the tavern and she didn't know whether to be disappointed, saddened, angry or confused. It wasn't like he was avoiding her, it was that he truely was avoiding her, the closest that had ever come to happening was during his four years in Spain. Ever since his return, he had made a point of coming to the tavern on a regular basis, no matter what else was happening, but now he had stopped.

If she was to be honest with herself, Victoria didn't like it. Zorro came and went, when he was with her there was excitement and adventure, the feeling of something greater, but he always left and it came to an end; but Diego was always there for her whenever she needed him, someone to talk to when she wanted to discuss something, someone to talk at when she needed to relieve her frustration with pueblo life in general and often the Alcade's schemes and taxes in particular. Without him, she was coming to realise, there was something missing in her life. Something that had come, over the years, to help define her life and who she was; innkeeper, tavern owner, a leader in the pueblo, the woman Zorro flirts with and Diego's best friend... and without Diego, she didn't feel complete. It didn't feel right.

Something was missing, Victoria realised, and there was only one way to get it back.

'If Diego won't come to the tavern...' Victoria decided firmly, 'Then after lunchtime, _I_ will go to _him_.'

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Diego was sitting in the library reading when Felipe came running into the room, signing rapidly. The young Don shook his head and laid the book down on the table beside him.

"Felipe... Felipe... Slow down. Slow down, Felipe, you know I can't understand you when you stutter."

Felipe rolled his eyes and repeated himself, slower.

"Victoria is at the front gate?"

The younger of the two men nodded and signed again.

"What are we going to do?" A nod answered the question and Diego continued, picking up his book, "Do as you wish, Felipe... Me, I do nothing."

It was probably just as well that Diego's attention had returned to his book and he never saw what Felipe had to say in response. It was just as well, he would probably have made his young friend and surrogate son wash his hands for it. It was a few minutes later that Victoria entered the library, but Diego's only response was to lick his finger and use it to flip backwards a few pages so he could re-read a paragraph before returning to pick up from where he had left off. After enough time had passed for Diego to turn several pages with no attention paid to her, Victoria put her hands on her hips and began glaring at Diego as he calmly continued to read.

"Dammit," She swore in a very unladylike manner when it finally became too much for her, "Diego, look at me."

"Why should I?" Diego turned another page without looking up, "You pay so little attention to anyone but Zorro, you've never noticed before whether or not I was looking at you. Why should that change now?"

The harshness of his words was made all the sharper by the casual, almost dismissive, way that he had spoken them, sharp enough to cut deep.

"I don't know what you mean, Diego," Victoria answered, hurt, "Have I ever neglected you or anyone else when you've came into the tavern?"

"No," the younger De la Vega appearantly thought of that as being answer enough as he returned his attention to his book and continued to read.

"Then would you _please_ tell me just what has been going on the last few weeks!"

"This might come as quite a shock," Diego finally closed his book and laid it off to the side as he spoke, looking at her with eyes colder than she had ever seen from him, "But I've given it a lot of thought..."

"Given what a lot of thought?"

"The simple fact that the truth is... The truth is that I've taken all I can and this is where it's got to end..." Diego took a deep breath before verbally jumping off a cliff, "Because I can't be your friend anymore."

Victoria wasn't expecting such a blunt statement from the normally polite Don, "What?"

"I can't be accused of not being there for you," Diego said, "How often have you shown up at the door of the Guardian or the hacienda with a problem?"

"Diego... I..."

"No, Victoria," Diego cut her off with uncharacteristic forcefulness in his voice, "Now is a time for you to listen... When I first came back from Madrid, I saw the girl I had grown up with had grown into a beautiful woman, a woman that I instantly fell in love with as soon as I saw her. I had thoughts of spiriting you away from the Pueblo, of us returning with you as my wife, but then Zorro appeared and all that changed, I couldn't compare and I had to come up with a new plan for my life... Every day I see you, every day I remember those thoughts, and it's killing me to know you without having a chance to hold you... when all I want to do is show you how I really feel inside."

"But I can't," Diego smiled grimly, "Because you see, I'm just a man and when a woman decides she's in love with a legend, no mere man will ever be worth it to her."

Those words caused Victoria to have a sudden flashback, a flashback back to the day when Zorro had proposed to her, how he had talked about there being a man under the mask no different from other men and afraid that she'd reject him without the mask.

"And so," Diego stood up quickly, making Victoria notice suddenly how he was likely one of the tallest men in the pueblo, almost as tall as Zorro himself, "Since I will be hurting no matter what happens, I've decided to hurt in a way that allows me to focus on other things in my life."

That statement cut and worse, it made Victoria realise that Zorro had been right when he had been concerned that she cared more for the legend than for the man. Here was a man that was hurting, a man that was supposed to be her best friend was hurting because of her, and her first thought was to mentally compare him to Zorro.

'When did I become so shallow and self-centered?' Victoria wondered to herself as Diego began to pace the room, only to physically wince as a worse implication occured to her, 'When did I become like the Alcade; so obsessed with Zorro that I didn't notice or care who was hurt by it?'

Diego could tell Victoria was beginning to think, so it was time for his secret weapon.

"I've been in correspondence with a very nice senorita from Arboleda del Angel," Diego said plainly, "I've been honest with her that another young woman has also held my interests and Isabella has agreed that our relationship will remain one of acquaintences until that situation has reached a resolution. I no longer care to remain in an unspoken competition with Zorro, Victoria, therefore my next letter will announce my intentions to declare an official courtship."

Victoria's jaw dropped, "You're what? Diego, you can't be serious!"

"Perhaps that's part of the problem," Diego looked at her and narrowed his eyes, "No one ever wants to take me seriously. Why should they? I'm just a scholar. Forget that scholars throughout history are the ones who invented the gunpowder used by the lancers; scholars created the wheels that carts of both Don and peon alike now move on; and even forget that some of the first scholars were the ones to discover metalworking, pottery and fire, all of which you use in the tavern, Senorita. I don't carry a sword or wear a mask, so obviously I don't matter, do I?"

"I've never said that!" Victoria exclaimed.

Diego shook his head in disappointment, "Your actions - and my father's, and the Alcalde's, and most of the Pueblo's - have said more than any words ever could, Senorita Escalante. Zorro is important because he comes swooping in and saves the day if the Alcade is taxing the farmers unfairly, but helping them find ways to grow more crops or find water when they need it so that they can pay the taxes that _are_ fair and still have money for their farms and families, that is unimportant because they are the acts of a scholar."

Then, to Victoria's surprise, he seemed to... unfold, for lack of a better word, as Diego stood up straighter, held his head higher, squared his shoulder and set his jaw, becoming the picture of a Californian Caballero.

"There are many things I can do," he informed her firmly, "But that is who I am; I am a scholar, I choose to be a scholar, I choose to help people in ways that no sword or whip can do, I choose to learn and teach what I have learnt to others.. and I will no longer accept the disrespect and humiliation I have taken for years because of it - from anyone. If it continues, I can just as easily call Arboleda del Angel home as I have Los Angeles."

Again, Victoria's jaw dropped, "You would leave Los Angeles?"

"When have I ever been given a reason to stay?" Diego retorted with uncharacteristic forcefulness, "When has anyone ever given me a reason to stay in this pueblo? Felipe plans to go to school to become a lawyer, when he does I can as easily correspond with him from Arboleda del Angel as I could from Los Angeles, and he is the only one who has given me any reason to remain where I am obviously unwanted."

"But we-" Victoria started, then froze as she realised that Diego's words were true; between the Alcalde's taunts, the way she had always compared him to Zorro and always unfavorably, Don Alejandro's constant comments about having a coward and a disgrace for a son and the general apathy and selfishness of the rest of the pueblo, no one besides the young man he considered his son had ever made Diego feel wanted after his return from Spain, after Don Alejandro had called his son away from his own life intending for Diego to fight everyone else's battles against the Alcalde for them... they had never stopped to consider how anyone would react to such a thing, how Diego would react to such a thing...

"We have," Victoria answered as her face fell, "We've done all of that and more, haven't we?"

It hurt Victoria to be on the recieving side of the kind of sternness that everyone had always pushed for Diego to show as he merely crossed his arms and slowly nodded agreement with her statement.

Victoria looked down to the floor as she asked, "Isn't there anything we can do to fix this, Diego?"

"I don't believe so at this point. Earlier, perhaps, but now..." Diego held out his hand, "My mother's ring, I'd like it back."

Head shooting up as her eyes went to meet his, Victoria gasped as her hand flew to her chest, to the ring hidden beneath her blouse, "What did you say?"

Diego's expression didn't change, "I'd like you to return my mother's ring, Senorita."

"But the only person whose..." Victoria shook her head in disbelief, "Zorro?"

Diego narrowed his eyes, "Zorro is a legend in a mask, I am a man, Senorita Escalante. A man who will no longer be insulted, who will no longer be mistreated, and who will certainly no longer be two sides of a love triangle. Now, the ring."

Her hands shaking, Victoria pulled carefully on the chain around her neck until the ring, Zorro's ring - Diego's ring, she corrected herself - fell outside her blouse.

"Diego, I..."

"It's too late, Victoria," Diego shook his head, "Too late to apologise, too late to make excuses, each person has their limits and I have reached my own."

Slowly, with tears beginning to form in her eyes, Victoria reached back and released the catch of her necklace so that she could remove it. Taking hold of the ring with one hand, she slowly pulled the chain away with the other until the empty chain dangled from the one hand with the ring held in the closed hand. Reaching out, Diego took her closed and and turned it over, looking her in the eyes as he did so, silently telling her to let go of the ring. Reluctantly, Victoria opened her hand and let the ring drop into Diego's waiting palm, just as the first tears fell from her eyes onto the floor between them.

"If you will excuse me, Senorita Escalante," Diego said with a grim finality, "I have a letter to write."

Victoria closed her eyes as Diego walked past her and fell to her knees as he walked out the door, wishing to God that she hadn't been so blind, so taken in by Zorro's dashing and daring that she'd never seen what was there until now when it was too late...

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Author's Note: I hold no shame for my little joke about where Diego's correspondent lives. If you didn't get it... I'll give you two hints; Arboleda means 'Grove' and take a look at some of the other fandoms I write in. Actually, when I first started writing this, it was intended for Diego to merely be forcing the situation between him, Victoria and Zorro to a head and for it to end on a Diego/Victoria note... the story, however, had its own more angst-filled plans...


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